Title

I've settled on a name for my WIP! Actually, I've been warring between two different ones for some time. But ultimately I decided on The Revengeful.

This makes it "official" I am dropping Charm Bracelet. I stopped querying some time ago, was just holding out to hear back on a full request. But ultimately, I could have done better. I rushed the end. I didn't do enough rewrites. In short, it's not a piece I would want anyone to see. I'm simply not that proud of it.

This one feels...different. But I promised myself I would take my time with it, not screw up a good thing. Frustrating at times (like last weekend, when I had to rewrite a chapter--twice), but hopefully worth it.

Query Time

I recently tinkered with my query for CHARM BRACELET. Since Marlowe's voice is kind of wryly funny, that's what I initially went for in my query. Except I think it was setting a skewed expectation for the tone of the book as largely comedic. And while there's definitely funny bits--well, people actually die in it. Unfortunately for them. So clearly some not-so-funny bits. I think the new version gets that across better. Have a looksie.

Marlowe Thomas is gifted, but not in the way most people think. Sure, her 4.0 grade average comes easily. And she’s one of the top gymnasts on the Devil’s Den High School varsity team. But Marley’s really special talents are ones she can’t put on her college application essays. Unless Georgetown is now offering courses in divination and telekinesis.

Marley’s halfway through her junior year, and she just found out she’s a witch.
So she’s going to tackle it like she does everything else—with hard work and diligence. Except there are the distractions…

Gabe Connelly is aloof and cautious, while his brother Fin thinks being a witch is all fun and games, no toil and trouble. Despite her overachieving personality, Marley gravitates toward fun-loving Fin after Gabe refuses to help her learn the Craft.

Until things get serious.

It began with the suicide that left the medical examiner scratching his head; and then the murders followed. All connected. All unexplained by modern medicine. Meanwhile, the entire cheerleading squad is acting like a bunch of brainwashed puppets. But who’s pulling the strings? Turns out, there’s another witch at school; one whose motivations are considerably darker than scoring beer underage. One by one she’s picking off the people she holds grudges against. And Marley is one of them.

CHARM BRACELET is contemporary YA—in the spirit of Mean Girls with a magical, murderous twist. The manuscript is complete at 55,000 words.

Status

Final edit is going great! About halfway through, and added a new opening "chapter." It's just one page, I guess you could call it a prologue. But I've heard agents hate prologues so I'm not going that route. I think it really adds some punch to the opening and sets the tone better for the book. There are some dark moments in the book that I don't think you'd expect based on the original first chapter. With the new addition, I think the reader knows what they're getting into right up front.

Confession

So I pulled a rookie move. I feel like I probably shouldn't even admit it, but seeing as I'm the only person who probably has ever laid eyes on this blog, I suppose I can treat it like a diary.

I haven't quite completed my final edit--and I submitted to 3 agents over the weekend anyway. I know, totally unprofessional. But they were 3 "yeah, right--in my wildest dreams" agents. The kind where you figure you have a better chance winning the lottery than getting a partial request from them.

So I wasn't shocked when I got a form rejection from Kristin Nelson today. But I have to say it stung a little more than I expected, just the same--I thought the query was pretty snappy. But then again, it's not the most original book idea so I can see how a lot of agents would pass. I mean it's basically Mean Girls with witches. Hopefully at least one agent will give it a chance and fall in love with the characters like I have, and enjoy my own personal twist on it.

The WIP

So I'm, what, 5 posts deep? I guess it's time I tell you a little bit about my current project, Charm Bracelet.

Now I'm a bit of a private person, and don't like to give out too many details on projects I'm working seriously on, but I will say the following:

High school. Teen witch trying to cop mad magic skills in between gymnastics practice and maintaining her 4.0 average. Cheerleader cult. Cute, tragic boy(s). Misunderstood bad witch from the trailer park. Mysterious homicides. (Because just plain ol' murders just don't cut it.)

P.S. Witches are the new vampires. Dig it!
P.P.S. Perhaps if I'm feeling brave, I'll get a sample up here soon. (I worked 60 hours this week at my day job, so it's quite possible I'm delirious enough to do such a thing.)